Ubiquitous Saigon Sights

These are the people in my neighborhood:

1) The Gum Ladies- The gum ladies all look the same. They are always wearing pyjamas and carrying a small child. When they get close to you, they shove a stack of gum packages in your face. They all want $20,000 dong per pack. It's always gum, and always the same brand.

2) The Squid Guy- the squid guy rides a bicycle around all night with a sort of clothesline contraption on the back with a bunch of dried squid pinned to it, always looking for customers. Don't quit your day job, dude.

3) The Bar Girls- The Bar girls get really excited if you come anywhere near the perimeter of their bar. Sometimes they yell, and sometimes they physically drag you in. They try to get you to buy them expensive drinks, and many of them are prostitutes. They usually range from un- to subtacular looking.

4) The Book Girls- The book girls carry unbelievably high stacks of books around for sale and if you stand still for two seconds in my neighborhood, you will most certainly be approached by one.

5) The Moto Taxi driver- This species' mating call is "You!You!motobai!", which he calls out while pointing at you and snapping his fingers. He always wants to take you somewhere. Even if you say no thanks, he says, "Where you go? Binh Thanh? Ngyuen Hue? De Tham? Come let's go..." You just have to keep walking. He doesn't persist for long.

6) Mr. Coconut- A Mr. Coconut always has a cone hat on, and always has a pole with a bucket of coconuts on either end that he carries around on his shoulders. Man, if you want a coconut, he's your man. He'll hack that sucker up for you before you can blink.

To be continued...